Meditation on Medicare: Making the Case for My Life

Today is a day of so many emotions. I don't know how in the world to describe every aspect of it. However, I know that there was something that I needed to say today. What I'm trying to do here is make the case for why society should make sure that Medicare stays available for for Americans.

It is incredibly hard to live in fear, real bone-chilling fear, that even with a cancer that has been manageable for nearly 10 years, it might not be enough. If the government withdrew Medicare, I could never afford to see the coordinating set of specialists who have--to every one's surprise--been able to keep me alive this long.

I'm not above begging for my life. I LOVE living. And maybe keeping me alive could help others, too. My case has been studied all around the USA. My cancer is so rare that there are only about 600 known cases of it in the world. If doctors and researchers can figure out how to deal with complex cases like mine, then it will be much easier for others in the future who find themselves facing a lupus or cancer diagnosis.

Screw it all! I'll be America's guinea pig. It sure as hell beats being dead. I gladly participate in the long shot strategies. Maybe when you need it, it won't be so risky, because they'll have figured out how to perfect it by trying it on people like me.

If society keeps me alive, I'll do my part to return the favor. Please y'all, please remember to fight for Medicare and Medicaid as this society tries to move toward a more humane system of care for everyone.

My TENTH Anniversary of National Cancer Survivors Day

TODAY IS NATIONAL CANCER SURVIVORS DAY. It's one of the most important days of the year, for me. I simply can't believe that I can now say that I have lived for ten years with bone cancer. How can it be true? I have persevered. I have learned to live with cancer instead of despite cancer.

There are so many things that I want to say, but I am verklempt. I feel so very thankful and unworthy and blessed and...I just think that I'm going to have to wait a few days to try to process this thick swirl of emotions that feel. Today I am alive and that, alone, is more than I have ever had reason to believe I'd be able to say ten years later.

Republican Prescient Vision of Earth = Dune

Sometimes I think that Republicans want to turn Earth into this galaxy's version of Dune. They could, they'd issue las-guns to all of the 2nd Amendment freaks and privatize all water sources, until the planet is sucked dry and almost all life as we know it has been destroyed. I'm afraid the Golden Path no longer exists.

To White LGBTQIA Folks Complaining About Homophobia in "The Black Church"

Actually, it's white church leaders who make up the majority of those complaining and threatening the President. You're just choosing to focus on the minority, which is convenient and predictable scapegoating. You're justified in not being impressed by them, just as I am justified in not being impressed by you.

It's so typical to see people avoid actually making real changes by ignoring those who are truly oppressing LGBTQIA folks. Instead, you participate in the marginalization of LGBTQIA folks like me. Sadly, there are many, many white LGBTQIA folks who would rather try to shift blame to people of color in order to avoid confronting the fact that it is other white people who are truly oppressing them. It's just so much easier to say that it's the Blacks, isn't it?

Have you forgotten the fact that Obama comes from "the black church" with "black church leaders"? Yet he has supported LGBTQIA folks more than any white religious President ever bothered to do. It was "the black church" that produced this President whose morals push him to seek equality for LGBTQIA people.

If what you said about "the black church" was true, then why has it always included and welcomed LGBTQIA folks into its hierarchy? If you were educated about "the black church", you'd know about the ubiquitous traditional roles that LGBTQIA play in their traditions. It sure as heck doesn't exist in the modern white evangelical churches that dominate this society.

I guess it would be asking too much for folks like you (white LGBTQIA folks who put themselves out there by whining about the presence of homophobia in Black churches), to actually ally with LGBTQIA people of color. While LGBTQIA people of color work to change the churches that kept them alive even when white LGBTQIA folks were perfectly content to see slavery and Jim Crow laws, people like you just sit there complaining and acting as if all of this activism doesn't exist.

Some days I just have to shake my head at the hypocrisy and un-examined privilege within white-dominated LGBTQIA communities.

My husband is 6'4" and an ex high school football player. I was a single mom with a 3 year old, when we met. I thought my daughter would be scared stiff at such an imposing figure. Instead, she just adored him. My nieces and nephews have always loved for him to hold them, too. He swings them around and tosses them in the air and catches them with that upper body strength that most women don't possess. I still feel jealous that I'm considered absolutely boring compared to him. He never had a child of his own, but he knew how to make kids feel comfortable. It was just instinctive for him. He's also the smartest, most compassionate man I've ever met.

Like Obama, he has a father who was a person of color and a white mother, though he was raised with just his mom and grandmother and his sisters. He was as poor as a church mouse when we met, but I could tell that with his brains (He has an IQ of 151) and attitude he was "going places". He now works for a video game company, doing what myriad kids across the country wish they could do for a living. We own our cars and our beautiful house outright (no mortgage) and we don't use credit cards. We're no millionaires, but we live comfortably.

I can relate to Obama much more than Romney. This guy had it all handed to him. He's the kind of guy who used to pay folks like me and my husband to write their college term papers for them and tutor them, because they couldn't be arsed to do such menial activities like researching stuff or attending class.

I had no problem taking their money, in exchange for my help, because it was all coming from their mommies and daddies anyway. However, they are NOT folks that I would put in charge of ANYTHING. I wouldn't trust Romney to babysit my fish over the weekend.

Is This Cat Zimmerman Serious?

Trayvon Martin: Parents Reject Zimmerman's Request for Private Meeting


Zimmerman is used to being able to weasel out of trouble. This fool has faced domestic violence charges and a felony charge for assaulting A POLICE OFFICER! I'm related to all kinds of politicians. I've seen folks in my family talk their way out of traffic tickets by making a call or passing a police officer their auntie/uncle/cousin's business card. I've seen one of my cousins have a DUI magically transform into "driving without a seat-belt" violation.

But never in my life have I ever heard of someone assaulting a police officer and having that charge knocked down to a misdemeanor...and that's despite living in Louisiana--the US state best known for its corrupt criminal justice system. Do you know how much PULL your daddy would need to have in order for you to be able to assault a police officer and, not only live to talk to talk about it, but actually walk away with nothing more than a misdemeanor?

So, maybe I shouldn't be surprised that Zimmerman thinks he can change the way things are going for him by being able to have a talk with this murdered child's family. However, even knowing all of that, I still felt flabbergasted when I saw this article. Let me tell y'all something. If I killed some one's child, even if it was a completely unavoidable accident, I would be scared out of my mind to be in the same room as that child's family. I know that if *I* was Trayvon's parents, I'd meet with him, because there aren't enough guards in the world to be able to keep my hands from wrapping around his throat until ONE of us met our maker that day.

What it Means to Vote for Mitt Romney

The first and fourth one would pretty much ensure that I'd die in less than a year. I wish this was just hyperbole, but it isn't. I hope voters understand these issues and take them seriously to get out and vote against this con artist, Romney. I'm just going to say a little of my situation for those who don't know anyone who will be directly affected by these two issues.

Insurance companies automatically dismiss me. They're not going to take on someone who has two major (often fatal) medical conditions. Medicare is the only thing keeping me alive. I'm in the middle of a health crisis right now. I have to see 4 different doctors just to manage my health, because no doctors are trained in the multiple specialties my care requires. I epitomize the kind of cases you see depicted on those stupid shows like "House" and "ER".

I'm down to a size 2 right now. If I lose just a little more weight, at least I'll qualify for one of those pretty white mausoleums that tourists love so much.

Please vote, people. I'm begging. There is pretty much no degrading thing that I would not do, if it would insure that I get to have a few more years with the love of my life and my only child. Do I need to tap dance? I'll do it. Do I need to shine shoes while wearing a big ol' sh*t-eating grin? I swear I won't complain. I just want to live.

Well, Kanye WAS a Jackass!

Some people have criticized President Obama for calling Kanye West a jackass and then, recently, reaffirming that this is his opinion.

Since he's a dad (more than just a father) to two lovely girls, I can see why President Obama would dislike what Kanye did. I have yet to see President Obama behave in an ungentlemanly or rude manner toward a young lady. Swift was receiving one of the biggest honors of her career, but Kanye's actions spoiled that moment for her. That's the G.R.I.T.S. reason why I agree with the President speaking out.

The "feminist" in me agrees, because it was obvious that what Kanye did was an act of machismo over a woman AND he did it before an audience of thousands of people across the USA who watched it. I really dislike Taylor's music--I prefer jazz--but, I am also a WOMAN and I did NOT agree with this misogynistic act. Feminists often ask, "Where are the men who disagree with misogyny?". Well, I'm happy to say there's at least one man like that sitting in the White House, right now.

As a person of color, I saw what Kanye did and couldn't stop shaking my head. Those of us who aren't multi-millionaires are forced to deal with the stereotypes that Kanye contributed to. It's hard enough having to pay the "black tax", without folks like Kanye engaging in behavior that seem to give credence to negative stereotypes. President Obama's comment was much appreciated, because he showed that there are Black men who do not behave that way and actually condemn it.

Does Bella Santorum Really Support the NRA?

Rick Santorum has a daughter, named Bella, with Trisomy 18. She is one of the 8-10% of children with Trisomy 18 who live past their first birthday.

I'm severely disabled. Like Bella, I've managed to survive for several years, despite odds so grim that doctors all over the country have studied my case. So, I have a really big soft spot for others who are beating the odds. I know what it has meant for my daughter to be able to still have her mother around--her best friend/cousin's mom developed cancer at the same time I did and died soon afterward, so my daughter is constantly reminded of how different her life could have been. When I've seen the Santorum family together, I've always been really happy for them that they still have their daughter alive and possess the economic resources to give her the best medical treatment available.

When I heard that Santorum dropped out of the race when his daughter was struggling with double pneumonia, I was really impressed. Knowing that he couldn't get enough delegates to win hadn't bothered him enough to drop out of the race, but the second his daughter needed him, it looked like he was willing to sacrifice his personal ambitions to put her first. I felt like even though he was a slimy, sneering, religious fanatic, maybe it was possible that he was still capable of being a decent father to his own kids.

Apparently, I was fooled. He is just one of many politicians who are willing to use their children with disabilities as a way to further their political ambitions. This guy is just an all-around shitty human being. I don't often use that kind of coarse language online, but this time I think it's appropriate. He's just a shitty little man with a big, shitty ego.